This Week In The News
This week, talks between auto supply company American Axle and the United Autoworkers resumed after American Axle agreed to provide the UAW with financial information regarding the company. The UAW's strike at American Axle has idled production lines at several auto companies for the past month. In a public statement, American Axle's CFO, I.M. Greedy noted, "As usual, the UAW is being nothing but destructive. Why can't they just accept the 'new realities' of the auto industry. That is, we live in a world where their wages will be cut in half because they must compete with foreign workers while management salaries will continue to grow as we outsource and push wages down. I mean, your way of life is over. Why can't you just grow up and deal with it. Pull the kids out of college forget about retirement and let us get back to business. Stupid blue collar worker. If only you had gotten an MBA like me..."
This week, the NYT reported on the Justice Department's practice of pursuing Deferred Prosecution Agreements (DPAs) with corporate wrongdoers instead of pursuing criminal prosecutions. Under a DPA, alleged corporate villains agree to pay a fine and be monitored by a third party. In exchange, the corporation avoids defending themselves in a court of law, and keeps the details of the allged wrongdoing secret. Moreover, DPAs can be lucrative for the select few law firms and consultants who are chosen by the government as monitors. Former Attorney General John Ashcroft's consulting company has made over $52 million monitoring a medical device company under a DPA. Asked why, in a world of Enron, Worldcomm and Bear Stearns, the government is shying away from prosecuting white collar crime, DOJ spokesman Sal Mineo noted, "For decades we have been trying to create a economic environment marked by low regulation, low taxes, low wages and little oversight. Some of that we accomplished by changing the law, but some of it we accomplish by just not enforcing the law. We call it, 'Operation Gangsta Paradise.' Asked if the DOJ would extend its philosophy of lax enforcement to drug crime or other street crime, a DOJ spokesman said, "Why no. That would be crazy."
This week, Sen. John McCain took his campaign to Westport,, CN and promised to wipe out the budget deficit by lowering taxes and growing the economy like his idol former President Ronald Reagan. Sen. McCain failed to mention that President Reagan actually tripled the federal budget deficit through a mix of tax cuts and increased military spending. Contacted for comment, a McCain aide quickly cleaned up the record, "As with any other Republican politician, the Senator was referring to the Mythical Reagan who created a healthy economy, balanced budgets, stared down the Soviets and made us all happy and giddy. He was not referring to the Actual Reagan who funded terrorists in Nicaragua, tripled the deficit, and started the largest expansion in wealth inequality since the Gilded Age.' Asked how the public could detect whether the Senator was talking about the Mythical Reagan or the Actual Reagan, the spokeman advised, "If his eyers tear up a little, assume the former."
This week, Attorney General Michael Mukaskey testified in front of the Senate Intelligence Committee in the hopes of procuring even greater surveillance powers for the U.S. government. Unfortunately, under questioning from Sen. Patrick Leahy, the Attorney General was forced to admit that he previously lied about a phone call that he claims the US was legally prevented from tapping just prior to the 9/11 attacks. Mukaskey admitted that he really had no knowledge of such a phone call and that even if he did, current laws would not have prevented the US from listening in on it. In short, Mukaskey admitted he was a big fat liar. Asked how he had moved from a jurist known for his integrity to just another Administration dissembler, Mukaskey paused and said, "I dunno. One day I had lunch with the President. I thought the Ruby Red tasted a little funny, but I didn't think anything of it. But then I started lying. First about little things- why I was wearing my wife's underwear, whether I let the dog out. But then they got bigger. Now I have this uncontrollable urge to tell people we have turned a corner in Iraq and that we need to bomb Iran. Its weird. It's like I cannot control myself...."
Quote of the Week:
"We haven't turned any corners. We haven't seen any lights at the end of the tunnel." Gen Davis Patreus, Commander of US Forces in Iraq testifying in Congress this week.
This week, the NYT reported on the Justice Department's practice of pursuing Deferred Prosecution Agreements (DPAs) with corporate wrongdoers instead of pursuing criminal prosecutions. Under a DPA, alleged corporate villains agree to pay a fine and be monitored by a third party. In exchange, the corporation avoids defending themselves in a court of law, and keeps the details of the allged wrongdoing secret. Moreover, DPAs can be lucrative for the select few law firms and consultants who are chosen by the government as monitors. Former Attorney General John Ashcroft's consulting company has made over $52 million monitoring a medical device company under a DPA. Asked why, in a world of Enron, Worldcomm and Bear Stearns, the government is shying away from prosecuting white collar crime, DOJ spokesman Sal Mineo noted, "For decades we have been trying to create a economic environment marked by low regulation, low taxes, low wages and little oversight. Some of that we accomplished by changing the law, but some of it we accomplish by just not enforcing the law. We call it, 'Operation Gangsta Paradise.' Asked if the DOJ would extend its philosophy of lax enforcement to drug crime or other street crime, a DOJ spokesman said, "Why no. That would be crazy."
This week, Sen. John McCain took his campaign to Westport,, CN and promised to wipe out the budget deficit by lowering taxes and growing the economy like his idol former President Ronald Reagan. Sen. McCain failed to mention that President Reagan actually tripled the federal budget deficit through a mix of tax cuts and increased military spending. Contacted for comment, a McCain aide quickly cleaned up the record, "As with any other Republican politician, the Senator was referring to the Mythical Reagan who created a healthy economy, balanced budgets, stared down the Soviets and made us all happy and giddy. He was not referring to the Actual Reagan who funded terrorists in Nicaragua, tripled the deficit, and started the largest expansion in wealth inequality since the Gilded Age.' Asked how the public could detect whether the Senator was talking about the Mythical Reagan or the Actual Reagan, the spokeman advised, "If his eyers tear up a little, assume the former."
This week, Attorney General Michael Mukaskey testified in front of the Senate Intelligence Committee in the hopes of procuring even greater surveillance powers for the U.S. government. Unfortunately, under questioning from Sen. Patrick Leahy, the Attorney General was forced to admit that he previously lied about a phone call that he claims the US was legally prevented from tapping just prior to the 9/11 attacks. Mukaskey admitted that he really had no knowledge of such a phone call and that even if he did, current laws would not have prevented the US from listening in on it. In short, Mukaskey admitted he was a big fat liar. Asked how he had moved from a jurist known for his integrity to just another Administration dissembler, Mukaskey paused and said, "I dunno. One day I had lunch with the President. I thought the Ruby Red tasted a little funny, but I didn't think anything of it. But then I started lying. First about little things- why I was wearing my wife's underwear, whether I let the dog out. But then they got bigger. Now I have this uncontrollable urge to tell people we have turned a corner in Iraq and that we need to bomb Iran. Its weird. It's like I cannot control myself...."
Quote of the Week:
"We haven't turned any corners. We haven't seen any lights at the end of the tunnel." Gen Davis Patreus, Commander of US Forces in Iraq testifying in Congress this week.
posted by Jack Reed at 2:33 PM
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